Emergency Mittens (novel)


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This page is about the short short novel. For the soft hand-wear, see Emergency Mittens (protective gear).

Emergency Mittens is a short short novel hastily written by DQN-kun while taking refuge in the secret area during the Great DQN Disaster of 1993.




It was a dark and stormy night in the Elitist Superstructure, Herr K was pacing back and forth in anticipation of his trial date in front of the magistrate again.

Meanwhile, a few rooms over, the Full Moon was holding the poor innocent Loli hostage. Squeeks, the world renowned gentleman, scholar and renaissance man, could not let a heinous crime like this go unpunished. With the aid of his sidekick >>1-kun, he was about to raid the Full Moon's hideout, with the aim of rescuing Loli and bringing the Full Moon to justice.

Herr K's pacing intensified.

The universe exploded.

But then it slowly reformed.

In this newly reformed universe the Full Moon had not taken the loli hostage. In fact, the Full Moon does not even exist in this universe.

The universe then exploded, never to reform again.


"Total cop-out. We'll never get published at this rate." - VIPPER

See Also

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