How to Love an Anime Character Even More
Learn how to fall deeply in love with a fictional character.
Contents
Steps
- Declare your undying love for your darling waifu.
- Accept that anime characters are as real as you believe they are and that nobody can take them away from you.
- Watch/play/read all of the source work relating to your beloved.
- Print out a picture of the character you are in love with. Put it in a classy looking picture frame and hang it from your wall. Gaze lovingly at it from time to time and perhaps caress her face a little as well.
- Cook a delicious meal and eat it together with her.
- Say "good night" to her every night before going to sleep.
- Consider purchasing a dakimakura of her. If she happens to be particularly plump, you can compensate by having her visage printed onto a mattress rather than a pillow.
- Marry said pillow.
- Construct a small shrine dedicated to your waifu.
- Spend all of your money on things which remind you of her.
- Manipulate the boundaries between dimensions and realities, shifting your existence to a universe in which you can meet your waifu in person.
- Congratulations! You have won at life. Feel free to kill yourself whenever you like.
Tips
- Never give up! True love is only a dimension away.
- Don't worry about going insane - it just means you love her all the more!
Warnings
- Masturbating to your waifu is considered distasteful by some.
- Don't try to force yourself to stop loving a fictional character; you'll probably just give yourself a mental breakdown or accidentally set yourself on fire.
Things you'll need
- An emotional bond to a fictional character.
- A reasonable amount of money
- The ability to manipulate boundaries between dimensions.
Things you'll no longer need
- Other people
- Pornography
- Bitterness
- Sanity