- 1 The Origin
- 2 Calvin and Hobbes
- 3 Creepy Prince
- 4 Double batch of copy pasta
- 5 Dance
- 6 Emo myspace guy
- 7 Fresh Evangelion
- 8 Fresh Jesus
- 9 Fresh Loli Graduation
- 10 Fresh Parents
- 11 Fresh Pirate
- 12 Fresh Pirate Bel-Aired
- 13 Fresh Prince Lyrics
- 14 Fresh WWII
- 15 Good Night, Fresh Prince
- 16 Papa Gino's
- 17 Proper English
- 18 Русский
- 19 Steve Irwin
- 20 That's it
- 21 Whoever reported me
- 22 WOW
- 23 Baseball game
Other kopipe categories: Heron • Yes, I am a fox • George Zimmer • Yoshinoya • I am related to 1 • Creepypasta • PIG DISGUSTING • Corea • Unlimited Blade Works • Japanophilia • Anime • 4chan • One Liners • Cracky Chan • Mitchell • Amerikkka • Computers • Emo Space Guy • John Stalvern • Shit was SO cash • Religion • Sex • Assorted kopipe • Navy SEAL • Chargers • Aikido • Atheist Professor
Calvin and Hobbes
Calvin lay there in bed, next to his tiger. His fourteenth birthday was tomorrow. He was getting older, puberty striking at his mind, voice, and body. He kissed Hobbes on the cheek, puling him closer and thanking him for being his friend.
Then it happened. It had been happening often since he was thirteen and he had no control over it. His erection tented his boxers, pressing against his friend's rump.
"Stop.." Hobbes mumbled with a growl, pushing him away.
Calvin turned onto his back, pulling his under shorts down and revealing his standing pillar, about five inches. Average, he figured.
He shook Hobbes awake. He didn't wake easily and grumbled and growled, but eventually sat up. "What, Calvin?" He asked angrily, wanting very much to go back to sleep.
"I love you."
"I love you too.." Hobbes said awkwardly. 'What is this about?' He wondered.
"Do you really love me?"
"Yeah, why?" Hobbes sat up further, sleep forgotten.
"I want to mate with you.." Calvin blushed.
"Wait! What? You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air.
I whistled for a cab and when it came near the liscence plate said "fresh" and had dice in the mirror. If anything, I could say that this cab was rare, but I though "nah, forget it, yo home to Bel Air"!
I pulled up to the house at about seven or eight, yelled to the cabbie, yo homes, smell you later. Looked at my kingdom, and I was finally there, to sit on my throne, as the Prince of Bel Air.
lol alot of this stuff in this thread is pretty legendary shit, though some a bit hard to belive. It actually all pales in comparison to this though, which actually I suggest if your anywhere in the bay area of san francisco, you try for yourself. At exactly 11:10pm, the San Francisco cab service changes shifts, and there are no cab drivers on the streets for approx. 10 minutes. During that time however, it has been rumoured if you stand outside Rylee Center and whistle for a cab, one will come near with "FRESH" on the plate and dice in the mirror. It's an extremely rare cab, but if you instruct the driver to deliver you to Bel Air, you'll pull up alongside a house the next night at around 7 or 8. I'd suggest tellin the cab driver you'll see him later, or later that night, while your sleeping in your house you'll notice a strange owl statue randomly in your room. Some have been known to try and call the cops about it, but the calls end up fragmented and extremely static-ful. What most people doing this didn't notice was the cab driver behind them as they stared at the statue, with a cold sharp knife. From that...well, lets just say how do you think Will Smith gets his kicks on route 66?
Double batch of copy pasta
Now, this is a story all about how My life got flipped-turned upside down And I liked to take a minute Just sit right there I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel Air
In west Philadelphia born and raised On the playground was where I spent most of my days Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool And all shootin some b-ball outside of the school When a couple of guys Who were up to no good Startin makin trouble in my neighborhood I got in one lil fight and my mom got scared She said "I just spent the last twenty minutes rubbing a twelve year old girl's bare chest.
"How?" you ask. Well apparently there are a select few contexts within which such an action is acceptable. For instance, if your niece has a hacking cough and your sister asks you to "put some of this on her" while she calls the doctor.
"Putting some of this on hear" meant using my bare hands to rub this vapor ointment shit all over her BARE NAKED CHEST. My heartbeat is still all erratic from it. I had a boner the size of manhattan the entire time. She's sleeping now and I guess she feels better because she stopped coughing.
Details: She's about 5 feet tall, has long brown hair, a cute face, a thin waist and long skinny legs. She's in jammies I think because although I'm pretty shaken up right now I know I unbuttoned something before I went at it.
God I feel so great. I just rubbed my hands lal over her FUCKING TITS, you guys. Well the puffy parts of her chest anyway. Her nipples got hard. I just about wept tears of joy.
I didn't do anything else because I'm a coward and rubbing was enough. Plus it was legal and I didn't technically do anything wrong, so I'm in the clear.
I'd write more but I seriously have to go fap while the memory is fresh in my head." Insert non-formatted text here
I need some help, fast! I just got back from my last school dance, and holy crap, I cant believe what I did. I went to the dance with my friend Emily, we just went as friends, I didn't realize she wanted more. I picked her up at her house, I couldn't believe what she was wearing, the sluttiest thing I've ever seen, a shirt that was transparent, and a skirt that was basically a line across her thigh, now I normally wouldn't complain about something like this, but this was my best friend, and i didn't feel right seeing that, but anyway, we got to the dance, we danced for awhile, but then the DJ played a song that will now forever remain embedded into my head, the song was duality by slipknot, as soon as this song came on, me and Emily began to dance faster, and she started rubbing up against me and dancing dirty.
I was absolutely appalled by her behavior, so I instinctively moved back and slapped her in the face, she immediately retaliated, slapping me, and saying "what the fuck is your problem" very loudly. now, everyone on the dance floor was staring at us, and i didn't know what to do. I stood there, the awkward silence growing, when I realized that there was only one thing to do, so I whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said fresh and there was a dice in the mirror, if anything I could say that this cab was rare, but I though "nah forget it, Yo home for Bel-Air!" I pulled, up to a house about 7 or 8 and i yelled to the cabby "yo home smell ya later" looked at my kingdom, I was finally there, to sit on my throne, as the prince of Bel-Air!
Emo myspace guy
I'm very sad with my life, /b/. It's because I want a girlfriend.
I try to get together on girls on MySpace, but it always ended up to fail, and backstab me RIGHT IN THE HEART. And these girls would say stuff like, "Leave me alone", "I'm calling the police if you stalk me on MySpace one more time..", or "Ew, you're so emo. Get away from me, freak, I already have a boyfriend."
IT'S NOT FUCKING FAIR, /B/. I WANT A GIRL WHO LOVES AND UNDERSTANDS ME SO FUCKING MUCH AND I CAN'T FIND HER. So that's why I whistled for a cab and when it came near The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror If anything I can say this cab is rare But I thought 'Now forget it' - 'Yo homes to Bel Air'
I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8 And I yelled to the cabbie 'Yo homes smell ya later' I looked at my kingdom I was finally there To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel Air.
By the way, this is me in the pic. The scar is from the pain I suffered.
Now this is the story all about how All life got flipped, turned upside down I'd like to take a minute for what it's worth I'll tell you how I became queen of the death and rebirth
In Nerv's lab born and raised Experiments are how I spent most of my days Being cloned, synchronizing, piloting, all cool And all taking a dip in Nerv's indoor pool
When a couple of Angels who were taller than a tree Started making trouble in Tokyo-dash-three I got in one little injury and Gendo got scared and said "We're gonna send Shinji Ikari out there!"
[Next verses are only on the full version, which was played only in the first three episodes of season one of "Shin Seki Fresh Queen of Death and Rebirth"]
We fought in many battles through many days But Shinji pussed out and he went off on his way He went to the train and he displayed his ticket He put his walkman on and said "I should have been hit!"
Then he comes back, yo what a fag! Just because of Misato, that stupid hag Is this what the second children ought to act like? Hmmm, this ain't quite right!
But wait, I hear the Seele, compilation and all that Is that the kind of end in store for this cool cat? I don't think so, nor does the third I hope they're prepared for the death and rebirth
Well, I was cloned again and when I came out There was dude looked like an Angel standing there with my name out I ain't the same as you, Kaworu, the fifth child So I knew that things were about to get wild
I whistled for Gendo and when he came near His hand was labeled "ADAM" and I pulled it in here I fused and grew huge, quite an increase in girth But I said "Aww forget it, time for death and rebirth!"
I pulled up to the lab around seven or eight And I yelled to the people "Yo homes, here is Rei!" But I took Shinji and sent him back to earth And so now I'm the queen of the death and rebirth
Now, this is a story all about how My body got nailed up to a cross And I liked to take a minute heres how begins I'll tell you how I died for all your mortal sins
In west Bethlehem I was born and raised In Nazareth was where I spent most of my days Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool And all makin some wood cups, wowin' some fools When a couple of Romans Who were up to no good Said I wasnt behavin; in the way that I should I had one last supper and my men drank wine I said eat my body drink my blood and Ill be fine
I was nailed a cross and when death came nearer The light shown brightly and I saw a little clearer If anything I could say that the roman wins But I thought now forget it, Ill die for your sins
They. pulled. me to my grave about seven or eight And I rose from my tomb yo, home smell you later Looked at my kingdom I was finally there To settle in heaven and listen to prayer
Fresh Loli Graduation
Not copypasta. I just didn't really have an appropriate image. I had to come and tell you guys this. Well, after the fapping.
Right, so, my brother is about eight years younger than me. Tonight he graduated from elementary school. I ended going along, partly because my brother's an okay guy and partly because my parents dragged me. So I got there, and the first thing I saw was that there were all these lolis. And the thing about elementary school grad lolis is that they like to think they're grown up. So, of course, they were all dressed really slutty. That was probably the third reason I stayed. Awesome smooth backs and delicious flat chests.
So the entire night was like slutty lolis on parade. But then, near the end of the ceremony, this one loli, who was trying not to look slutty and so was wearing a dress that went down to her feet (but strapless, so she still failed at the not slutty look) goes up. She walked across the stage and got her diploma, and then she headed for the stairs down. Then, right as she got there, she stepped on the bottom of her skirt. I could tell right away it was going to go. She slipped forward and tried to grab it, but by then it was over her delicious flat chest and about to go the whole way. To top it off, she was stumbling toward the stairs. She was about to fall and my mom got scared, she said "You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in bel Air." I whistled for a cab, and when it came near, The license plate said "fresh" and it had dice in the mirror. If anything I could say that this cab was rare, But I thought "Nah forget it, Yo home to Bel Air." I pulled up to the house about seven or eight, and I yelled to the cabby "Yo holmes, smell ya later." Looked at my kingdom, I was finally there, To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel Air.
FUCK YOU /B/, I TRIED TO EXPLAIN /B/ TO MY PARENTS, SO I LOAD UP 4CHAN, TELL THEM 'OK, YOU'LL SEE SOME DISGUSTING STUFF, I GUARANTEE IT'
AND THERE'S FUCKING CP ON THE FIRST FUCKING PAGE.
I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU AS LONG AS I LIVE AND SHE SAID, "you're movin with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air." I WHISTLED FOR A CAB AND WHEN IT CAME NEAR THE LICENSE PLATE SAID "FRESH" AND IT HAD DICE IN THE MIRROR. IF ANYTHING I COULD SAY THIS CAB WAS RARE BUT I THOUGHT "NAH FORGET IT... YO HOLMES TO BEL AIR!" I PULLED UP TO THE HOUSE ABOUT 7 OR 8 AND I YELLED TO THE CABBY "YO HOLMES SMELL YOU LATER!" I LOOKED AT MY KINGDOM I WAS FINALLY THERE TO SIT ON THE THRONE AS THE PRINCE OF BEL AIR."
Now here be a tale, all about how me life got flipped, turned upside-down, And I'd like to take a minute, So just sit right there, I'll tell you how I became the pirate of a port called Bel-Air. In West Philadelphia, born and raised, On the shipyard is where I spent most of me days Chillin out, maxin', relaxin' all cool, And all shootin some cannons outside of the galleon When a couple of Brits, who were up to some good, Started shippin' gold in me neighborhood, I got in one little battle and me captain got scared He said 'You're movin with your first mate and cabin boy in Bel-Air!' I whistled for a dingy and when it came near The side said 'S.S. Fresh' And it had dice in the mast! If anything I could say that this dingy was rare But I thought 'Yarr, forget it - Yo, mate to Bel-Air!' I pulled up to the port about seven or eight, I yelled to the captain 'Yo mate, smell thee later!' Looked at my kingdom, I was finally there To sit on me throne as the pirate of Bel-Air!
Fresh Pirate Bel-Aired
Now here be a tale, all about how me life got flipped, turned upside-down, And I'd like to take a minute, So just sit right there, I'll tell you how I became the pirate of a port called Bel-Air. In West Philadelphia, born and raised, On the shipyard is where I spent most of me days Chillin out, maxin', relaxin' all cool, And all shootin some cannons outside of the galleon When a couple of Brits, who were up to some good, Started shippin' gold in me neighborhood, I got in one little battle and me captain got scared He said 'You're movin with your first mate and cabin boy in Bel-Air!' I whistled for a dingy and when it came near The side said 'S.S. Fresh' And it had dice in the mast! If anything I could say that this dingy was rare But I thought 'Yarr, forget it - Yo, mate to Bel-Air!' I pulled up to the port about seven or eight, I yelled to the captain 'You're movin with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air!' I whistled for a cab and when it came near The license plate said 'Fresh' And it had dice in the mirror If anything I could say that this cab was rare But I thought 'Nah, forget it - Yo, home to Bel-Air!' I pulled up to the house about seven or eight, I yelled to the cabbie 'Yo home, smell ya later!' Looked at my kingdom, I was finally there To sit on my throne as the prince of Bel-Air!
Fresh Prince Lyrics
Now, this is a story all about how My life got flipped--turned upside down And I'd like to take a minute Just sit right there I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel-Air
In west Philadelphia born and raised On the playground was where I spent most of my days Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool And all shootin some b-ball outside of the school When a couple of guys Who were up to no good Startin makin trouble in my neighborhood I got in one lil fight and my mom got scared She said 'You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air.'
I begged and pleaded with her day after day But she packed my suite case and send me on my way She gave me a kiss and then she gave me my ticket. I put my walkman on and said, 'I might as well kick it'.
First class, yo this is bad Drinking orange juice out of a champagne glass? Is this what the people of Bel-Air Live like? Hmmmmm this might be alright.
But wait I hear they're prissy, bourgeois and all that Is this the type of place that they send this cool cat? I don't think so I'll see when I get there I hope they're prepared for the prince of Bel-Air
Well, ah, the plane landed and when I came out There was a dude looked like a cop standin' there with my name out I ain't trying to get arrested yet I just got here I sprang with the quickness like lightening, disappeared
I whistled for a cab and when it came near The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror If anything I can say that this cab was rare But I thought 'Man forget it' - 'Yo homes to Bel-Air' I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8 And I yelled to the cabbie 'Yo holmes smell ya later' I looked at my kingdom I was finally there To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel-Air
In Western Europe born and raised, At the theater room where I spent most of my days, Planning plotting and acting all cool, Shooting some traitors to instill loyalty true, When a couple of Allies were up to no good, Started running forces through our neck of the woods, We lost a couple of little fights and my generals got scared, They said "You're moving with your cabinet to the bunkers down there"
I waited for my escort and when they came near, The jeeps had troops and guns in the rear, If anything I thought this protection was rare, But I said "Nah forget it, yo home to down there!"
I pulled up to the elevator at about seven or eight, And yelled to the guys "Yo troops, your medals come later" I looked at my bunker, I was finally there, To settle my defeat as I breathed in stale air.
Good Night, Fresh Prince
Actor/Musician Will Smith, Dead At 37 Monday, June 26th, 2006 Posted: 4:42 PM EST (16:42 GMT)
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania (AP) -- Will Smith, the famous actor and musican, has died late Sunday night in his home town of Philadelphia.
Smith, 37, was killed in a car accident late in the evening. Smith was stuck by a taxi cab while speaking with his wife Jada Pinkett Smith, the cab was speeding and came onto the sidewalk striking Smith and throwing him face first against the windshield. Smith was killed instantly.
One eyewitness who will remain nameless stated "The last thing he saw was the dice on the mirror".
"This is a long sad day for us." Wayne Phillips Philadelphia chief of police said.
Will Smith was the second of four children of Caroline and Willard Smith Sr. He grew up in middle class West Philadelphia and got the nickname 'Prince' because of the way he could charm his way out of trouble. Pursuing music, he met Jeff Townes at a party and they soon began performing together as DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince. After his music sales stated to slide Will began an acting career on the hit TV Show "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. Will basically played himself; a street-smart West Philly kid transplanted to Beverly Hills. The series lasted 6 years. During that time, he ventured into movies where the critics took note of him. In 1996 he had a huge hit with the Blockbuster Independence Day where he played the alien-battling Marine Corps Captain Steven Hiller.
The accident was a hit and run and the perpetrator is still at large. According to eyewitnesses the license plate on the vehicle said "FRESH"
Phillips said "It's a really sad moment for us."
God damn you, /b/. I fucking hate you. I've been noticing how you've been fucking with my head, making me see memes everywhere, and now it cost me my job.
I used to work at a pizza joint called Papa Gino's, which is a chain here in New England. Today, two guys came in, and they were very obviously a couple. Never in my life have I seen people this blatantly gay. Now, I'll be the first to admit that I'm a bleeding heart liberal hippie treehugger commie bastard, and I'm even bisexual myself, but DAMN these two were gay. Everything was going fine, right up until I served them their food. Instead of the usual "enjoy your meal" bit that I usually say, /b/ seized control of my brain.
"There you are, guys. Enjoy your AIDS." As soon as that A passed my lips, alarm bells went nuts in my head. But it was too late. I didn't realize what I had just done until I had finished speaking. The two guys just stared at me in shock for a momment, and I went pale. I knew that my days of free pizza and all the Mountain Dew I could drink were over in that one instant.
The two dudes go DIPSHIT. My manager comes over, and there's screaming about hate crimes, bigotry, lawsuits, and one of them even stood up and threatened to beat the shit out of me. We got into a fight, and my manager got scared, and said youre moving with your aunte and uncle in bel-air.
I whistled for a cab, and when it came near, the license plate said "fresh" and there were dice in the mirror. If anything I could say that this cab was rare, but I thought "naw forget it, yo home to bel-air!"
I pulled up to the house about seven or eight and I yelled to the cabbie "yo homes smell ya later!" Looked at my kingdom, I was finally there. To settle my throne as the prince of bel-air.
To begin, this is a tale of how my very existence was twisted and transformed in a most peculiar way. Please have a seat, for I wish to take a moment to relate to you the fascinating odyssey which ultimately led to my reign as the Prince of Bel-Air. I was sired and reared in West Philadelphia. As a lad, most of my time was spent at the neighborhood recreation center where I would laze about and relax in a most charming manner - that is, when I was not engaging my chums in a friendly game of basketball at the schoolhouse. Around this time, two young hooligans had begun to stage a campaign of vandalism and intimidation in my neighborhood. When my mother discovered I had had a bit of an altercation with the ruffians, she insisted I leave town at once and take up lodgings with my aunt and uncle in Bel-Air. As the taxi approached, heeding my beckoning whistle, I could discern the word "FRESH" emblazoned upon its license plate, and took particular note of the pair of plush novelty dice which hung from the rear-view mirror. I was a bit taken aback by these strange omens, but quickly put them out of my mind as I cheerfully called to the driver: "To Bel-Air, my good man!" We arrived safely in Bel-Air at dusk, and as the driver came to a stop in front of the house where I was to live, I left him with the words: "Farewell, sir. Perhaps my nostrils shall delight in your aroma once more!" To be sure, it was a long journey, and as I gazed upon my estate in all its splendor, I knew once and for all that my rightful place was on the throne - as the young scion of the great and mighty kingdom of Bel-Air!
этот рассказ весь про то как моя жизнь
верх ногами перевернулась
займу я минуту, тут седя
расскажу вам как стал князем
городка по название бел айре
в западной филаделфии - родился и вырос
на детской площадке я проводил большинство своих дней
а тогда два парня которые нехорошего задумали
начали создавать неприятности в раёне
я попал в одну малую драку, и моя мать испугалась
она сказала, «ты едешь жить с дядей и тётей в бел айре»
свистнул я такси, и когда она подъехала
номер у неё был «фрэш» и весели на зеркале игральные кости
если чего, мог бы я сказать что эта такси редкая
но подумал «не, забудь»
«эх пацан - в бел айр!»
подъехал я к дому в семь или восемь
крикнул водителю, «воли от сюда»
посмотрел я на царство, на конец то приехал
сидеть на троне как князь бел ейра
In West Australia, born and raised. In the ocean, there I spent most of my days. Chillin out, maxin; relaxin all cool, stroking some stingrays inside the pool. When a couple of crocs who were up to no good, started making trouble in Australia Zoo. So I got one little bite, and Terri got scared. "you're moving with your aunt and uncle in Bel Air" I whistled for a boat and when it came near, the licence plate said fresh and had dice in the mirror. If anything, I'd say that this boat was rare, but forget it, yo captain to Bel Air. I pulled up to the sting ray about seven or eight and I yelled to the captain yo holmes smell ya later. Looked at the sting ray my heart it did puncture i sit on my grave as the crocodile hunter
I thought the CP faggotry would end, but I am now posting an e-mail to the local police office, hopefully they will contact doug
I hope that doug realises that he has to remove the pedo shit out of /b/, or /b/ won't exist anymore. I like /b/, and SAID, "you're movin with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air." I whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said FRESH and it had dice in the mirror. If anything I could say this cab was rare but I thought "Nah forget it... Yo homes to Bel-Air!" I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8 and I yelled to cabby "Yo Holmes Smell you later!" I looked at my kingdom I was finally there to sit on the throne as the Prince of Bel-Air."
Whoever reported me
Thank you, whoever reported me. Now PayPal is threatening to close the account Because I seem to be holding a lottery. Never have I seen so many ingrates. Not that you have to give me money, just so many people taking 4chan for granted and not even trying to understand a absolutely wacky situation. That whole post was for a loan of sorts and trying to possibly get rid of $500 in merchandise I'd otherwise sell for a pittance to someone who doesn't care. Oh well. Anyway, here is my address again. If you want the PayPal one, you'll have to move in with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air. You have to whistle for a cab and when it comes near the license plate will say fresh FRESH and there'll be dice in the mirror. If anything you could say the cab is rare but yu'll think "Nah forget it... Yo homes to Bel-Air!" You'll pull up to the house about 7 or 8 and yell to cabby "Yo Holmes Smell you later!" Then look at your kingdom your was finally there! Now sit on your throne as the Prince of Bel-Air.
Yeah, i went from EVE to WoW.
The thing is, EVE lacks so much content. Yeah, its fun to the newbie zone and pod people with a single torpedo. But advancing just takes so much longer to do, and its not fun. Its not fun to travel 15 jumps just to get ganked by pirates. Then you lose your ship, need to make more money, bla bla bla. Whenever i tried to mine in some of the safer zones there was always 4 or 5 strip miners there. You run over to within a Kilometer of the astroid when they pop, and then some uber miner drains it in one hit from like 100 miles away.
Another thing that disappointed me is that you couldnt get near to planets, or land on them. I tried to whistle for a cab and when it came near The license plate said "Fresh", and it had dice in the mirror If anything I could say that this cab was rare But I thought man forget it yo homes to Bel-Air I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8 And I yelled to the cabbie 'yo homes smell ya later' Looked at my kingdom I was finally there To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel-Air
The outlook wasn't brilliant for the Mudville Nine that day;
The score stood four to two, with but one inning more to play,
And then when Cooney died at first, and Barrows did the same,
A sickly silence fell upon the patrons of the game.
A straggling few got up to go in deep despair. The rest
Clung to that hope which springs eternal in the human breast;
They thought, if only Casey could get but a whack at that -
We'd put up even money, now, with Casey at the bat.
But Flynn preceded Casey, as did also Jimmy Blake,
And the former was a lulu and the latter was a cake;
So upon that stricken multitude grim melancholy sat,
For there seemed but little chance of Casey's getting to the bat.
But Flynn let drive a single, to the wonderment of all,
And Blake, the much despis-ed, tore the cover off the ball;
And when the dust had lifted, and the men saw what had occurred,
There was Johnnie safe at second and Flynn a-hugging third.
Then from 5,000 throats and more there rose a lusty yell;
It rumbled through the valley, it rattled in the dell;
It knocked upon the mountain and recoiled upon the flat,
For Casey, mighty Casey, was advancing to the bat.
There was ease in Casey's manner as he stepped into his place;
There was pride in Casey's bearing and a smile on Casey's face.
And when, responding to the cheers, he lightly doffed his hat,
No stranger in the crowd could doubt 'twas Casey at the bat.
Ten thousand eyes were on him as he rubbed his hands with dirt;
Five thousand tongues applauded when he wiped them on his shirt.
Then while the writhing pitcher ground the ball into his hip,
Defiance gleamed in Casey's eye, a sneer curled Casey's lip.
And now the leather-covered sphere came hurtling through the air,
And Casey stood a-watching it in haughty grandeur there.
Close by the sturdy batsman the ball unheeded sped-
"That ain't my style," said Casey. "Strike one," the umpire said.
From the benches, black with people, there went up a muffled roar,
Like the beating of the storm-waves on a stern and distant shore.
"Kill him! Kill the umpire!" shouted someone on the stand;
And it's likely they'd a-killed him had not Casey raised his hand.
With a smile of Christian charity great Casey's visage shown;
He stilled the rising tumult; he bade the game go on;
He signaled to the pitcher, and once more the spheroid flew;
But Casey still ignored it, and the umpire said, "Strike two."
"Fraud!" cried the maddened thousands, and echo answered fraud;
But one scornful look from Casey and the audience was awed.
They saw his face grow stern and cold, they saw his muscles strain,
And they knew that Casey wouldn't let that ball go by again.
The sneer is gone from Casey's lip, his teeth are clenched in hate;
He pounds with cruel violence his bat upon the plate.
And now the pitcher holds the ball, and now he lets it go,
And now the air is shattered by the force of Casey's blow.
Oh, somewhere in this favored land the sun is shining bright;
The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light,
And somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere children shout;
But there is no joy in Mudville—
Mighty Casey got in one little fight and his mom got scared
And She Said "You're Moving with Your Auntie And Uncle in Bel-Air."
Casey Whistled For A Cab and When It Came Near The
License plate Said Fresh and Had a Dice in the Mirror
If Anything Casey Could Say That This Cab Was Rare
But Casey Thought Now Forget It, "Yo Homes To Bel-Air!!!"
Casey Pulled Up To a House About Seven or Eight
And He Yelled To The Cabby "Yo, Homes Smell You Later!!!"
Looked At His Kingdom He Was Finally There
To Settle His Throne as the Prince of Bel-Air.