Kopipe:Yoshinoya

Classic Translation

Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. That it's really related to this thread.
I went to Yoshinoya a while ago; you know, Yoshinoya?
Well anyways there was an insane number of people there, and I couldn't get in.
Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had "150 yen off" written on it.
Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots.
You, don't come to Yoshinoya just because it's 150 yen off, fool.
It's only 150 yen, 1-5-0 YEN for crying out loud.
There're even entire families here. Family of 4, all out for some Yoshinoya, huh? How fucking nice.
"Alright, daddy's gonna order the extra-large." God I can't bear to watch.
You people, I'll give you 150 yen if you get out of those seats.
Yosinoya should be a bloody place.
That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the U-shaped table can start a fight at any time,
the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place.
Women and children should screw off and stay home.
Anyways, I was about to start eating, and then the bastard beside me goes "extra-large, with extra sauce."
Who in the world orders extra sauce nowadays, you moron?
I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want to eat it with extra sauce?"
I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour.
Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "extra sauce"?
Coming from a Yoshinoya veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, extra green onion.
That's right, extra green onion. This is the vet's way of eating.
Extra green onion means more green onion than sauce. But on the other hand the price is a tad higher. This is the key.
And then, it's delicious. This is unbeatable.
However, if you order this then there is danger that you'll be marked by the employees from next time on; it's a double-edged sword.
I can't recommend it to amateurs.
What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with today's special.

The Original, Untranslated

そんな事より１よ、ちょいと聞いてくれよ。スレとあんま関係ないけどさ。
このあいだ、近所の吉野家行ったんです。吉野家。
そしたらなんか人がめちゃくちゃいっぱいで座れないんです。
で、よく見たらなんか垂れ幕下がってて、１５０円引き、とか書いてあるんです。
もうね、アホかと。馬鹿かと。
お前らな、１５０円引き如きで普段来てない吉野家に来てんじゃねーよ、ボケが。
１５０円だよ、１５０円。
なんか親子連れとかもいるし。一家４人で吉野家か。おめでてーな。
よーしパパ特盛頼んじゃうぞー、とか言ってるの。もう見てらんない。
お前らな、１５０円やるからその席空けろと。
吉野家ってのはな、もっと殺伐としてるべきなんだよ。
Ｕの字テーブルの向かいに座った奴といつ喧嘩が始まってもおかしくない、
刺すか刺されるか、そんな雰囲気がいいんじゃねーか。女子供は、すっこんでろ。
で、やっと座れたかと思ったら、隣の奴が、大盛つゆだくで、とか言ってるんです。
そこでまたぶち切れですよ。
あのな、つゆだくなんてきょうび流行んねーんだよ。ボケが。
得意げな顔して何が、つゆだくで、だ。
お前は本当につゆだくを食いたいのかと問いたい。問い詰めたい。小１時間問い詰めたい。
お前、つゆだくって言いたいだけちゃうんかと。
吉野家通の俺から言わせてもらえば今、吉野家通の間での最新流行はやっぱり、
ねぎだく、これだね。
大盛りねぎだくギョク。これが通の頼み方。
ねぎだくってのはねぎが多めに入ってる。そん代わり肉が少なめ。これ。
で、それに大盛りギョク（玉子）。これ最強。
しかしこれを頼むと次から店員にマークされるという危険も伴う、諸刃の剣。
素人にはお薦め出来ない。
まあお前、１は、牛鮭定食でも食ってなさいってこった。

The Original

One day I have been to Yoshinoya in the neighborhood,Yoshinoya.
So many people were there that I couldn't sit on the chair .
Then, I looked at the banner well,it was written " 150 yen discounted "
Are you fool?
Or are you poor?
Hey boy ! Don't come to Yoshinoya you don't usually come in because of 150 yen discounted.
How silly you are! It's just 150 yen discounted and it is 150 yen!
There are some families. 4 persons, all of the family, come to Yoshinoya?
Hahaha,,it's so funny.
The father said "Well, I shall order Tokumori". This situation looked ugly and poverty.
Oh boy ! They must leave the seat because I give them 150 yen.

It should be bloodier.
Is it not strange that I and one who sat opposite side of U type table start fighting.
It is cool that situation I will kill him or I will be killed by him.
Girls and kids should keep away.

Well, as soon as I had sat barely, a man who had sat beside me said "I want Tokumori Tsuyu-daku"
So I gotta angry again."Hey boy ! With too much sauce is not popular now."
He was stupid to say "Tsuyu-daku" with the happiest simle.
I wanted to ask him "Do you really want to eat it ?",
and to question colosely, and to interrogate for about one hour.
I thought him just wanted to say "with too much sauce".

A specialist of Yoshinoya, I'd like to say that the finest order is "Negi-daku".
That is the coolest.
"Omori Negi-daku with a fresh egg "
it is the most popular style of us, the cult of Yoshinoya.
Negi-daku is full with much onion.
Instead of that it's with mere beef.This is so good.
And it with a fresh egg. This is the best.

However there is an accident you will be on the staffs' mark next time,if you order one.
It is a sword which has sevral blades.
It is not recommendable for the laymen.
You, poor laymen, had better eat regular meal with beef and salmon.

Reisen's Version With Translator Notes and Comments

Omori - Large order
Tokumori - Extra large order
Tsuyudaku - Extra sauce
Negidaku - Extra onions
Teishoku - Set

Tone : The speaker is talking to >>1 in a friendly and casual tone, not trying to threaten him, but trying to create a bit of rapport talking to someone unfamiliar. 

Anyway, >>1, listen to me for a bit. It's related to the thread.
I went to the local neighborhood Yoshinoya. (1) Yoshinoya.
The place was packed, so I couldn't sit down anywhere.
Then, I took a careful look at the banner hanging down and saw that it had "150 Yen Discount" written on it.
Are you all fools? Idiots?
Hey idiots, you aren't regulars of Yoshinoya, but you came because of a 150 yen discount. That's real foolish of you.
It's 150 yen. One hundred fifty yen.
There are even kids with their parents here. Family of four at Yoshinoya? That's just lovely. (2)
"Alright! Papa's going order a tokumori!", the father said. I can't stand watching them anymore.
You fools, I'll give you 150 yen if you vacate your seats.
Yoshinoya should be a bloodier (3) place.
It isn't a strange thing for me and the dude sitting across those U-type tables to get ready to start a fight. (4)
Stab someone or be stabbed, this atmosphere is a good thing. 
Women and children should leave.
Finally, when I was about to sit down, the dude next to me orders a tokumori tsuyudaku. I got angry again. 
Idiot, tsuyudaku isn't popular anymore! 
He ordered it with a boastful expression on his face. (5)
Fool, let me ask you, do you really want to eat it with all that sauce? I want to interrogate him. 
I want to interrogate him for a good hour. 
You, did you just want to say just "tsuyudaku"? 
Since I'm a regular of Yoshinoya, I'm in a position to tell you about the latest craze among regulars is omori negidaku. This is it. Omori negidaku. 
This is the regular's way. An omori negidaku has a lot of onions in it. 
You get more onions in place of less beef. This is how. 
So get an omori negidaku with an egg. (6) This is the best. 
However, it comes with a price. 
The next time you order it, there is a chance that the employees will mark you up for it. 
It's a double-edged blade. 
This is not recommended for amateurs. 
Which means, >>1, you should just get used to the beef and salmon teishoku. (7)

1 - The popular English translation left this part out, how it's around the neighborhood. The original and more Engrish one leaves it.
2 - Sarcastic tone.
3 - A bit of context here. The speaker wanted to imply that the place was already slightly brutal. However, the classic translation leaves that part out.
4 - Note that he can also be referring to regulars starting fights, not just himself. The original translation uses "I". This one used "me".
5 - The classic translation omits this. 
6 - Omitted by the classic translation.
7 - Translated as set here. If anyone bothered to check Yoshinoya's menu, the beef and salmon teishoku is a regular menu item that comes in a set along with sides, not just a special. 

You can see the beef/salmon teishoku here at Yoshinoya's site.

ビデオ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3giEHjS7f6k

Curry House

[21:49] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Hay guise.
[21:49] <&Corrosive> hi
[21:50] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> So, I went to Curry House a while ago. You know, Curry House?
[21:50] <&Wik> hey Reisen-Udongein-Inaba
[21:50] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Well, there was an insane number of people, and I couldn't get in.
[21:50] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Then, I looked on the sign outside, and it said discount.
[21:51] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Oh, the stupidity.
[21:51] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Those idiots.
[21:51] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> You, don't come to Curry House just because there's a discount, fool.
[21:51] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> It's only a discount. DIS-COUNT, for crying out loud.
[21:51] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> There are even entire families here.
[21:52] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Family of 4, out for some Curry House, huh? How nice.
[21:52] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Must be one hell of a special occasion.
[21:52] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> And then the dad's like, okay, I'm gonna make mine a jumbo.
[21:52] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Just shoot me now.
[21:52] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Hey, guys. I'll give you a discount, so scram.
[21:52] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Curry House is supposed to be a more brutal place.
[21:52] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Nothing odd about getting in a fight with the person opposite you at one of those U-shaped tables.
[21:52] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Knife someone, or get knifed yourself.
[21:52] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> That's the atmosphere we want around here.
[21:53] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Women and children should get lost.
[21:53] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> So I finally found a place to sit when the guy on the table behind me ordered a large bowl with extra sauce.
[21:55] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> And I snapped again.
[21:55] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Now look here. Extra sauce ain't the "in" thing no more, dumbass.
[21:55] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Don't come in here looking like you're all that and ordering no extra sauce.
[21:55] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> I want to know if you really want that extra sauce.
[21:55] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Put you on the rack. For a whole hour.
[21:55] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Yeah. You probably just ordered that for the hell of it.
[21:56] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> As a regular of Curry House, I can tell you that the current fad is extra spinach, cheese, and a croquette. That's the thing.
[21:57] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> A croquette, and some spinach and cheese in the sauce. That's how we roll.
[21:58] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> If you just order extra cheese, you get more cheese.
[21:58] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Which means you get less sauce.
[21:58] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> So get some spinach and a croquette to top it off, and you're set.
[21:58] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> But once you've ordered it, your name will be on their list.
[21:58] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> A double-edged sword.
[21:58] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> Can't recommend this to an amateur.
[21:59] <&Reisen-Udongein-Inaba> You, poor laymen, had better order the regular spicy beef curry.

Wendy's Japan

I just got back from Wendy's a while ago. That fast food restaurant.
The place was jam packed, so it was a while before I could order.
I looked at one of the signs on the window that said "Bacon Deluxe Half 100 Yen OFF!"
Are you guys fools?
Or are you just poor?
Hey, idiots. Don't come to Wendy's. You just came over because of some advert.
How silly you are. It's only 100 yen. One hundred yen off of the bacon deluxe.
There's even a bunch of ganguros over here. Four friends at Wendy's?
Must be one hell of an orgy.
The darker girl said "Like, oh my God! I'll get a Wendy's Triple!" This situation looked impovershed, and they looked ugly.
Jesus Christ, they better get the hell out of their seats if I give them 100 yen.

It should be more tense in here.
It's a cool thing that people avoid staring at each other to avoid getting into fights.
Get your order, sit down, eat, and shut up. That's how people should eat.
Laymen and regulars should find another restaurant.

When I nabbed a seat across the counter after I ordered, some guy in line goes:
"I'd like to order a Baconator."
Then I got angry once more. "Hey boy! The single baconator's out of style!"
He was stupid to order the single baconator with the happiest smile.
I wanted to ask him "Do you think you're trying to lose weight by eating one less?"
Throw him in the meat locker for an entire hour.
Yeah, you probably don't exercise at all.

Since I go to Wendy's for lunch occasionally, I'd like to tell everyone that the best thing to get is the Foie Gras Rossini Burger.
You heard me, foie gras.
Foie Gras Rossini with a Frosty on the side.
This is the most popular order among the regulars.
This burger has a healthy serving of foie gras.
Patty's the same size, but you get tasty foie gras slices. This is awesome.
Then eat that Frosty to cleanse the palate. The best thing.

However, there's a chance that the employees will recognize you next time if you order one.
It's a double-edged blade.
This is something that I can't recommend to the laymen.
Which means you, poor laymen, had better order the Shrimp Supreme with a chili baked potato.

[CAPTCHAISSTILLBROKEN://wendys.co.jp/wendys/index.php The Foie Gras Rossini does look mighty tasty...]

Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei Version

Anyway, listen to my story.

The other day, I went to a nearby Yoshinoya. A Yoshinoya.

And there was a huge crowd, so I couldn't find a place to sit.

And after a closer look, I saw that the banner read something like 150 yen off.

Seriously, are you morons? Idiots?

Hey, losers. Don't suddenly show up at Yoshinoya because of a goddamn 150 yen price drop.

It's 150 yen. A hundred fifty yen.

And there's even a family here.

Four people having a family dinner at Yoshinoya, huh?

Must be one hell of a special occasion.

And then the dad's like, okay, I'm gonna make mine a jumbo.

Just shoot me now.

Hey, guys, I'll give you 150 yen, so scram.

Yoshinoya is supposed to be a more brutal place.

Nothing odd about getting in a fight with the person opposite you at one of those U-shaped tables.

Knife someone, or get knifed yourself.

That's the atmosphere we want around here.

Women and children should get lost.

So I finally found a place to sit when the guy next to me ordered a large bowl with extra soup.

And I snapped again.

Now look here. Extra soup ain't the "in" thing no more, dumbass.

Don't come in here looking like you're all that and ordering no extra soup.

I want to know if you really want that extra soup.

Put you on the rack. For a whole hour.

Yeah. You probably just ordered that for the hell of it.

As a regular of Yoshinoya, I can tell you that the current fad is extra onions. That's the thing.

A large bowl with egg. Extra onions. That's how we roll.

If you just order extra onions, you get more onions.

Which means you get less beef.

So, get extra onions and an egg, and you're set.

But once you've ordered it, your name will be on their list.

A double-edged sword.

Can't recommend this to an amateur.

Etc.

Conversational English

Well, never mind all that, >>1. This has nothing to do with this thread, but would you just listen to me for a little bit? See, I went to the local Yoshinoya today. Right. Yoshinoya. And the damn place was packed so full of people, I couldn't even find a seat. So I looked around a bit, and I found a sign that said "150 yen off". What the hell is wrong with you people? Are you idiots or something? Any other day you wouldn't even think of going to Yoshinoya, but if it's 150 yen off, you all flock in here? It's just 150 fucking yen! 150 yen! And you're bringing the kids too. Look at that, a family of four going to Yoshinoya. Con-fucking-gratulations. And now the guy's going, "All right! Daddy's going to order the extra-large!" Shit, I can't watch any more of this.

Yoshinoya should be fucking brutal. Two guys sit facing each other across a U-shaped table, and you never quite know if they'll suddenly just start a fight right there. It's stab-or-be-stabbed, and that's what so damn great about the place. Women and kids should stay the fuck away.

Well, I finally found a seat, but then the guy next to me goes, "I'll have a large bowl with extra gravy!". So now I'm pissed off again. Who the fuck orders extra gravy these days? Why are you looking so goddamn proud when you say that? I was gonna ask you, are you really going to fucking eat all that gravy? I wanted to fucking interrogate you. For about a fucking hour. You know what? I think you just wanted to say "extra gravy".

Now, take it from the Yoshinoya veteran. The latest thing among the Yoshinoya pros is this: Extra green onions. That's the ticket. A large bowl with extra onions, and egg. This is what someone who knows his shit orders. They put in more onions, and less meat. A large bowl with the raw egg, that's really fucking awesome. Now, you should know, if you keep ordering this, there's a risk employees might write you up. This really is a double-edged sword. I really can't recommend this for amateurs.

And you, >>1, well, you should really just stick to today's special.

JunkyFoodGuy Version

Anyways, butt, please cat to me. That it's really butted to this butt. I went to Buttnoya a while ago; you know, Buttnoya? Well anyways there was an insane number of butt there, and I couldn't cat in. Then, I looked at the butt hanging from the cat, and it had "150 butt off" butten on it. Oh, the stupidity. Those buttots. You, don't come to Buttnoya just because it's 150 cat off, fool. It's only 150 cat, 1-5-0 BUTT for crying out butt. There're even entire cats here. Cat of 4, all out for some Buttnoya, huh? How fucking butt. "Alright, cat's gonna order the extra-butt." Cat I can't bear to watch. You butt, I'll give you 150 cat if you get out of those cats. Buttnoya should be a bloody place. That tense cat, where two butts on opposite sides of the U-shaped cat can start a butt at any time, the butt-or-be-butted mentality, that's what's great about this place. Cat and butt should screw off and stay home. Anyways, I was about to start butting, and then the butt beside me goes "extra-large, with extra butt." Who in the world orders extra butt nowadays, you moron? I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want to eat it with extra butt?" I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an butt. Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "extra butt"? Coming from a Buttnoya veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, extra green cat. That's right, extra green cat. This is the vet's way of eating. Extra green cat means more green cat than butt. But on the other hand the cat is a tad higher. This is the key. And then, it's delicious. This is unbuttable. However, if you order this then there is danger that you'll be marked by the cat from next time on; it's a double-edged butt. I can't recommend it to cats. What this all really means, though, is that you, butt, should just stick with today's cat.

Afghanistan

Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. That it's really related to this thread, though. I went to Afganistan a while ago. Yeah, THAT Afganistan. Well anyways there was an insane number of mass communications there so I couldn't commence an attack. Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had "Al-Kaida" or something written on it. Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots. You don't come to Afganistan just because it's war, morons. It's just war. W-A-R for crying out loud. There're even entire families here. Family of 4, all out for some Afganistan, huh? How fucking nice. "Alright, daddy's gonna drop'em some food." God I can't bear to watch. You people, America will do everything from there now on, so fucking clean this land of yourselves. Afganistan should be a more bloody place. That tense atmosphere, when a fight with the guy on opposite seat who recites the Coran can be started at any time, the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place. Women and children should screw off and stay home. Anyways, just when I finally calmed down, the next bastard beside me goes "let's betray Northern Alliance, shall we?" That just pissed me off even more. Who in the world deserts army and betrays, you moron? What does "let's betray Northern Alliance" have this fucking proud face of yours? I want to ask him this, do you REALLY want to betray?" I want to interrogate him. I want to fucking interrogate him for an hour. Isn't it that you just wanted to try saying "NATO"? Coming from a Afgan veteran such as myself, the latest trend in Afganistan nowadays is of course this: self-exploding terrorism. Anthrax and self-exploding terrorism. That's what you should ask for normally. Self-exploding is praised after death. But on the other hand there's not enough satisfaction in the bereaved family. This is the key. And then there's anthrax. This is the most of all. However, if you order this then there is danger that you'll be marked by the UN from next time on; it's a double-edged sword. I can't recommend it to amateurs. What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with Ramadan.

Dairy Queen

Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. That it's really related to this thread.
I went to Dairy Queen a while ago; you know, Dairy Queen?
Well anyways there was an insane number of people there, and I couldn't get in.
Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had "Free ice cream" written on it.
Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots.
You, don't come to Dairy Queen just because there is free ice cream, fool.
It's only free ice cream, FREE ICE CREAM for crying out loud.
There're even entire families here. Family of 4, all out for some Dairy Queen, huh? How fucking nice.
"Alright, daddy's gonna order the sundae." God I can't bear to watch.
You people, I'll give you free ice cream if you get out of those seats.
Dairy Queen should be a bloody place.
That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the U-shaped table can start a fight at any time,
the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place.
Women and children should screw off and stay home.
Anyways, I was about to start eating, and then the bastard beside me goes "Cone, extra fudge."
Who in the world orders extra fudge nowadays, you moron?
I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want to eat it with extra fudge?"
I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour.
Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "extra fudge"?
Coming from a Dairy Queen veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, blizzard with extra Kit-Kat.
That's right, extra Kit-Kat. This is the vet's way of eating.
Extra Kit-Kat means more Kit-Kat than ice cream. But on the other hand the price is a tad higher. This is the key. And then, it's delicious. This is unbeatable.
However, if you order this then there is danger that you'll be marked by the employees from next time on; it's a double-edged sword.
I can't recommend it to amateurs.
What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with the banana split.

Elitist Superstructure

Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. It's not really related to this song, but hear me out anyways. I went to the Elitist Superstructure of DQN a while ago; you know, the Elitist Superstructure? Well anyways there was an insane number of people there, and I couldn't get a post in. Then, I looked at the first thread, and it had "ITT we make a really long song" written on it. Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots. You, don't post in DQN just because there's a really long song, fool. It only goes to 999 posts, 9-9-9 posts for crying out loud. And there are even spammers here. Family of spammers, all out to finish the really long song, huh? How fucking nice. "Okay, that's it. We're finishing this long song one way or another." God I can't bear to watch. You people, I'll give you 999GET if you quit posting. The Elitist Superstructure of DQN should be a bloody place. That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the threads can start a fight at any time, the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place. Spammers and Tripfags should just stay home. Anyways, I was about to start posting, and then the spamming bastard beside me posts "Let me just make this clear, don't fire both guns at the same time, but one by one simultaneously! That's the basic skill of a double barrelled gunman." Who in the world posts "Let me just make this clear, don't fire both guns at the same time, but one by one simultaneously! That's the basic skill of a double barrelled gunman" nowadays, you moron? I want to ask him, "Do you REALLY want to post a random quote from a fan translation of The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi?" I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour. Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "double barrelled gunman"? Coming from a DQN veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is the Yoshinoya rant parody. That's right, the Yoshinoya rant parody. This is the vet's way of posting in a song. The Yoshinoya rant parody means a longer post. But on the other hand the potential for people finding it funny is a tad higher. This is the key. And then, it's delicious. This is unbeatable. However, if you order this then there is danger that you'll be marked by the MODD from next time on; it's a double-edged sword.I can't recommend it to amateurs. What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with "under the moon loli to issho".

Fancy Hearing Cake

Hey, listen to me for a moment, a'ight? I don't care if it's not related to this thread. Just listen!

Yesterday, I went over to the Elitist Superstructure of DQN to make a simple thread. Yes, THAT Elitist Superstructure, DQN. But the whole place was so crowded, I couldn't even find a seat for hours! Then I saw a poster that said "Special offer! 150 yen discount". I thought to myself... geez, that's so fucking amazing. You guys don't even normally visit Yoshinoya. All you bastards came here just for that stupid-assed 150 yen discount. Just for that 150 yen. ONE FREAKIN' FIFTY YEN!!

Then I saw some parents & children. A family of four eating in DQN. Damn, so much for that bitch's home-cooked family feast. Then one of the little brats said "Daddy's gonna order a fancy hearing cake".

I couldn't believe it! Uuuuuggh, are you out of your fucking mind!? Shiiit, i'll give you a fancy hearing cake just to move your stanky fat-ass out of a seat. Dude, you just don't go to DQN for that lala-oh-i'm-so-happy dinner bullshit. It's where you pick a fist-fight with the fucking guy sitting across 'yah in that U-shaped table.

Kill or be killed. Heh... now that's the kinda shit I like. Ladies, kids, stand back... 'cuz everything's gonna get FUCKED UP NOW.

After waiting for ages, I finally found an empty seat. But then, the guy next to me ordered by saying "A fancy hearing cake with a LOTTA' baby juice".

Dude, that just pissed me off even more. Shit, you just don't say "lotta' baby juice" nowadays, ya' freaking bastard.

How the fuck can you say "lotta' baby juice" with that "oh, i'm so fucking cool, hur-hur-hur..." look!?!? Damn, I was THIS CLOSE to standing in front of his face and yelling "DO YOU EVEN LIKE EATING THAT MUCH FUCKIN' BABY JUICE!?" For a freaking hour, I was THIS CLOSE to doing that. Shit, I bet you just wanted to use the words "lotta' baby juice" out loud. Wow, you're so clever.

Dude, you gotta be like ME. See, now I know what's "all that" in the Elitist Superstructure of DQN. What's cool right now to say is "Mama-daku". That's it! You see now, a large fancy hearing cake with a lotta mother's hearts is what the hardcore DQN freaks eat. Like ME. Saying "Mama-daku" means that you get less cucumber, but they put a WHOLE MESS of mother's hearts. Mmmmm... a large fancy hearing cake with mother's hearts, now THAT'S what I call a meal.

But anywhoo... ordering that is kinda' like a double-edged sword. Cuz' then the waiters might notice you the next time you come by. So yeah, I can't reccomend this to noobs. For you, just go order a cucumber and holy water combo. That's as far as you can go, you know what i'm sayin'?

Myspace

Pay no attention to all that! Current mood: crazy Category: MySpace

This probably makes no sense, but listen anyway. Yesterday I went to myspace, you know.. That place of meeting. Anyway, the servers kept timing out and I couldn't get in. When I finally logged in, I become angry. "326 messages! 43 Friend invites!" You fools, you IDIOTS! You don't come to Myspace and make requests to people you don't know! Myspace should be a brutal place, where people stab each other in the face from the opposite ends of the planet. That's what I would like, Emo kids and drama whores stay away if you really value your life! Anyway, I calm down and go through the business of my day. I come across a message "You don't know me, but I know this person wants you...". I'm angry again. I want to ask them, "Why do you know this and why should I meet them?" I want to interrogate them for an hour. Coming from a Myspace veteran such as myself, It's meaningful friendships That's right, Personal face to face, real life relationships with others. That's the real meaning to Myspace. That's what makes things work. It's unbeatable! Watch your back, though. This will make you appear to be an attention whore, and people will surely make notice of you. I can't recommend it to your typical emo kid. What this all means, my friend, is that you should just stick to Livejournal...

Ristorante di Milano

Hey, listen to me for a moment, a'ight? I don't care if it's not related to this thread. Just listen!

Yesterday, I went over to the Ristorante di Milano for a simple meal. Yes, THAT Italian restaurant, Ristorante di Milano.
But the whole restaurant was so crowded, I couldn't even find a seat for hours!
Then I saw a poster that said "Special offer! €12 discount".
I thought to myself... geez, that's so fucking amazing. You guys don't even normally visit Ristorante di Milano.
All you bastards came here just for that stupid-assed €12 discount.
Just for those 12 Euros. TWELVE FREAKIN' EUROS!!

Then I saw some parents & children. A family of four eating out at the Ristorante di Milano. Damn, so much for that bitch's home-cooked family feast.
Then one of the little brats said "Daddy's gonna order a large Bruschetta Fegatini".
I couldn't believe it! Uuuuuggh, are you out of your fucking mind!?
Shiiit, i'll pay you €12 just to move your stanky fat-ass out of a seat.
Dude, you just don't go to the Ristorante di Milano for that lala-oh-i'm-so-happy dinner bullshit.
It's where you pick a fist-fight with the fucking guy sitting across 'yah in that U-shaped table.
Kill or be killed. Heh... now that's the kinda shit I like.
Ladies, kids, stand back... 'cuz everything's gonna get FUCKED UP NOW.

After waiting for ages, I finally found an empty seat. But then, the guy next to me ordered by saying "A large Neopolitan pizza with a LOTTA' pepperoni".
Dude, that just pissed me off even more. Shit, you just don't say "lotta' pepperoni" nowadays, ya' freaking bastard.
How the fuck can you say "lotta' pepperoni" with that "oh, i'm so fucking cool, hur-hur-hur..." look!?!?
Damn, I was THIS CLOSE to standing in front of his face and yelling "DO YOU EVEN LIKE EATING THAT MUCH FUCKIN' PEPPERONI!?"
For a freaking hour, I was THIS CLOSE to doing that.
Shit, I bet you just wanted to use the words "lotta' pepperoni" out loud. Wow, you're so clever.

Dude, you gotta be like ME. See, now I know what's "all that" in the Ristorante di Milano.
What's cool right now to say is "Pennette con Ricotta & Melanzane". That's it!
You see now, a large pasta serving with aubergines & ricotta is what the hardcore Ristorante di Milano freaks eat. Like ME.
Saying "Pennette con Ricotta & Melanzane" means that won't get a pizza, but they put a WHOLE MESS of pasta.
Mmmmm... a lotta pasta, now THAT'S what I call a meal.
But anywhoo... ordering that is kinda' like a double-edged sword. Cuz' then the waiters might notice you the next time you come by.
So yeah, I can't reccomend this to noobs.
For you, just go order a Prosciutto e Melone al Ventaglo. That's as far as you can go, you know what i'm sayin'?

Safari Zone

Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. That it's really related to this thread. I went to the Safari Zone a while ago; you know, Safari Zone?
Well anyways there was an insane number of people there, and I couldn't get in.
Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had "150 Poké off" written on it.
Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots.
You, don't come to the Safari Zone just because it's 150 Poké off, fool.
It's only 150 Poké, 1-5-0 POKé for crying out loud.
There're even entire families here. Family of 4, all out for some rare Pokémon, huh? How fucking nice.
"Alright, daddy's gonna catch a Girafarig." God I can't bear to watch.
You people, I'll give you 150 Poké if you get out of those bushes.
The Safari Zone should be a bloody place.
That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the U-shaped shrubbery can start a battle at any time,
the Hyper-Beam-or-be-Hyper-Beamed mentality, that's what's great about this place.
Women and children should screw off and stay home.
Anyways, I was about to start catching, and then the bastard beside me goes "Chansey, with Rollout."
Who in the world uses Rollout nowadays, you moron?
I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want to use a move that takes five turns?"
I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour.
Are yo1, please listen to me. That it's really related to this thread. I went to the Safari Zone a while ago; you know, Safari Zone?
Well anyways there was an insane number of people there, and I couldn't get in.
Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had u sure you don't just want to try saying "Rollout"?
Coming from a Safari veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, Farfetch'd.
That's right, Farfetch'd. This is the vet's way of Pokémon catching.
Farfetch'd means more green onion than anything. But on the other hand the price is a tad higher. This is the key.
And then, it's awesome. This is unbeatable.
However, if you catch this then there is danger that you'll be marked by the old toothless man from next time on; it's a Double-Edge attack.
I can't recommend it to amateurs.
What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with fighting Youngsters outside of Pallet Town.

Soviet Russia

Soviet Russia went to me, you know, Soviet Russia?
Well anyways there was an even more insane number of people in line, and I
couldn't get in.
Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had "1 ruble
off" written on it.
Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots.
Soviet Russia doesn't come to you just because it's 1 ruble off, fool.
It's only 1 ruble, 1 POINT ZERO rubles for crying out loud.
There're even entire families here. Family of 4, Soviet Russia out for you.
"Alright, daddy's gonna order the borscht." God I can't bear to watch.
You people, I'll give you 1 ruble if you get out of those seats.
Soviet Russia should be a bloody place.
That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the U-shaped table can start a fight at any time,
the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place.
Women and children should screw off and stay home.
Anyways, I was about to start eating, and then the bastard beside me goes
"Borscht, with extra vodka."
Who in the world orders extra vodka nowadays, you moron?
I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want to eat it with extra vodka?"
I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour.
Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "extra vodka"?
Coming from a Soviet Russia veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, extra iron.
That's right, extra iron. This is the vet's way of eating.
Extra iron means more iron than sauce. But on the other hand the price is a tad higher. This is the key.
And then, it's delicious. This is unbeatable.
However, if you order this then there is danger that you'll be marked by the employees from next time on; it's a double-edged sword.
I can't recommend it to amateurs.
What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with today's special.

What the Pho

Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. That it's really related to this thread.
I went to What the Pho a while ago; you know, What the Pho?
Well anyways there was an insane number of people there, and I couldn't get in.
Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had "4 dollars off" written on it.
Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots.
You, don't come to What the Pho just because it's 4 dollars off, fool.
It's only 4 dollars, 4 DOLLARS for crying out loud.
There're even entire families here. Family of 4, all out for some What the Pho, huh? How fucking nice.
"Alright, daddy's gonna order the extra-large." God I can't bear to watch.
You people, I'll give you 4 dollars if you get out of those seats.
What the Pho should be a bloody place.
That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the U-shaped table can start a fight at any time,
the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place.
Women and children should screw off and stay home.
Anyways, I was about to start eating, and then the bastard beside me goes "extra-large, with extra noodles."
Who in the world orders extra noodles nowadays, you moron?
I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want to eat it with extra noodles?"
I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour.
Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "extra noodles"?
Coming from a What the Pho veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, extra fatty flank.
That's right, extra fatty flank. This is the vet's way of eating.
Extra fatty flank means more fatty flank than noodles. But on the other hand the price is a tad higher. This is the key.
And then, it's delicious. This is unbeatable.
However, if you order this then there is danger that you'll be marked by the employees from next time on; it's a double-edged sword.
I can't recommend it to amateurs.
What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with the chicken pho.

Functional programming

Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. Not that it's really related to this thread. I went to /prog a while ago; you know, world4ch? Well anyways there were an insane number of Haskell programmers in there, and I couldn't post. Then, I googled for the Haskell homepage, and it had "PURELY FUNCTIONAL PROGRAMMING LANGUAGE" written on it. Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots. You don't use a programming language just because it s purely functional, fool. It's only referential transparency, FORCED NO SIDE EFFECTS for crying out loud. There're even companies using it. Company of 400 employees, all downloading some Haskell compiler, huh? How fucking nice. Alright, my manager's gonna use Haskell for the whole project. God I can't bear to watch. You people, I'll give you a damn purely functional language for FREE if you stop fagging up my /prog. /prog should be a bloody place. The tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of an open discussion can start a fight over VIM vs Emacs at any time, the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place. Haskell fags should screw off and stay home. Anyways, I was about to discuss dynamic typing, and then the bastard beside me goes programming, with Haskell. Who in the world uses Haskell, you moron? I want to ask him, do you REALLY want to use Haskell? I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour. Are you sure you don't just want to try saying Haskell? Coming from a expert programmer such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, multi-paradigm languages. That's right, multi-paradigm languages. This is the vet's way of programming. Multi-paradigm languages means more functionality than fappage. But on the other hand the theoretical correctness is a tad lower. This is the key. And then, it's powerful. This is unbeatable. However, if you try this then there is danger that you'll be marked by trolls from next time on; it s a double-edged sword. I can't recommend it to amateurs. What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with today's special.

McDonald's

The other day. I went to the neighborhood McDonald's. Y'know, Mac.
But there was a whole crowd of people there, and I couldn't sit down.
And then, I saw a curtain hanging from the ceiling, which had "Megamac" written on it.
Come on, you retards. You idiots.
Hey, you guys, don't come to McDonald's just because it says Megamac, morons
It's Megamac!
Fucking Megamac!
There are parents and children here too. A four person family coming to McDonalds?
"All right, Papa's gonna order some Megamacs--"
I can't watch anymore.
You bastards, I'll give you a hamburger if you leave those seats.
McDonald's, it should be more bloodthirsty.
During mealtimes, a brawl might start at the cash register.
Provoked or unprovoked. That kind of atmosphere would be great.
If you've brought a woman, piss off.
So, just when I'd finally sat down, the guy in the neighbooring booth asks for "a cheeseburger"
That really got my blood boiling.
Hey you, Cheeseburgers aren't that popular at all, you know?
Retard. He says "cheeseburger" with such an arrogant face.
I want to has him if he really wants to eat a cheeseburger.
I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for an hour.
You, did you really want to order a cheeseburger?
I'm a McDonald's expert, and among us McDonalds's experts, the most popular dish recently is the chicken fillet. It's that.
A chicken fillet for the go. That's a McDonald's expert's recommendation.
Chicken fillets have chicken meat in them. There's more chicken than vegetables.
Get that. That, and a large fries. It's the best.
But if you order it, the employees will annoy with stuff like "Sir, chicken fillets will take a bit of time, is that OK with you?"
I can't recommend this to an amateur. So then, you bastards, what I mean is that you should just eat a hamburger.

Gamestop

Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. That it's really related to this thread.
I went to Gamestop a while ago; you know, Gamestop?
Well anyways there was an insane number of people there, and I couldn't get in.
Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had "Black Ops Preorder" written on it.
Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots.
You, don't come to Gamestop just because of preorders, fool.
It's only COD, C-O-D for crying out loud.
There're even entire families here. Family of 4, all out for some game, huh? How fucking nice.
"Alright, daddy's gonna get the limited-edition." God I can't bear to watch.
You people, I'll give you the preorder bonus if you get out of those lines.
Gamestop should be a bloody place.
That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the U-shaped counter can start a fight at any time,
the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place.
Women and children should screw off and stay home.
Anyways, I was about to start paying, and then the bastard beside me goes "Black Ops preorder, hardened edition."
Who in the world gets the hardend edition nowadays, you moron?
I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want the steelbook case?"
I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour.
Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "hardened edition"?
Coming from a Gamestop veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, Prestige edition.
That's right, Prestige. This is the vet's way of playing.
Presige edition means it comes with an RC car. But on the other hand the price is a tad higher. This is the key.
And then, it's awesome. This is unbeatable.
However, if you preorder this then there is danger that you'll be marked by the employees from next time on; it's a double-edged sword.
I can't recommend it to amateurs.
What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with the regular edition.

/jp/

Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. That it's really related to this thread.
I went to /jp/ a while ago; you know, /jp/?
Well anyways there was an insane number of people posting there, and I couldn't get in.
Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had "Otaku Culture" written on it.
Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots.
You, don't come to /jp/ just because it's Otaku Culture, fool.
It's only Otaku Culture, O-T-A-K-U CULTURE for crying out loud.
There're even entire families here. Family of 4, all out for some /jp/, huh? How fucking nice.
"Alright, daddy's gonna reply to this troll." God I can't bear to watch.
You people, I'll give you Otaku Culture if you get out of those seats.
Yosinoya should be a TRU NEET place.
That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the computer screen can start an e-fight at any time,
the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place.
Women and children should screw off and stay home.
Anyways, I was about to start posting, and then the bastard beside me goes "extra-shitty, with currybutt."
Who in the world orders currybutt nowadays, you moron?
I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want to eat it with currybutt?"
I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour.
Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "currybutt"?
Coming from a /jp/ TRU NEET such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, extra hoop-dog.
That's right, extra hoop-dog. This is the vet's way of eating.
Extra hoop-dog means more hoop-dog than currybutt. But on the other hand the quality is a tad higher. This is the key.
And then, it's delicious. This is unbeatable.
However, if you order this then there is danger that you'll be marked by Suigin from next time on; it's a double-edged sword.
I can't recommend it to normalfags.
What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with today's 2hu thread.

alternate ver

Anyways, >>1, listen to me here. It's not really related to the thread, but whatever.
So, I went to /jp/ the other day. /jp/.
The place was packed and I couldn't get a post in anywhere for some reason.
Then, I notice the header up top and I see "Otaku Culture" written on it.
"Are you stupid? Are you idiots?" I thought.
You don't just come to /jp/ for otaku culture, you fools.
It's otaku culture, O-T-A-K-U CULTURE for christ's sake.
There's even groups of friends here. Out for some /jp/ with the bros, huh? How fucking nice.
"LOL anime is so weird!" God, I can't bear to watch.
You people, I'll give you otaku culture if you just get out of /jp/.
/jp/ ought to be a more violent place.
That tense atmosphere where a flamewar could start between the guy on the other side of this shitpost at any moment.
Troll or get trolled, that's what's great about this place.
Normalfags can fuck off back to reddit.
So anyway, I'm finally about to start posting, and then the guy next to me says "2hu with extra flanfly".
I lose it again.
Look, flanfly isn't funny anymore around here. Dumbass. What are you looking so smug for?
I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want that flanfly?"
I want to interrogate him. Interrogate him for an hour.
Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "flanfly"?
If you ask a truneet such as myself, the best meme on /jp/ now is hoopdog.
Thats right. Hoopdog with seven hoops. This is the truneet's way of posting.
With seven hoops you get maximum replies, but the thread blows up.
And then, its a shit. A big one. A grat one.
However, there's a chance you'll get marked by meido from then on, so its a double-edged sword.
I can't recommend it to newfags.
What I mean by all this, >>1, is that you should just stick to the which2hu thread.

VIPcast VIPPER edition

Anyways, VIPPER, please listen to me. That it's really related to these listeners.
I went to Secret areas of vip quality a while ago; you know, SAOVQ?
Well anyways there was an almost 10 people there, and I couldn't access the servers.
Then, I looked at the banner at the top of the site, and it had "150 VIP coins" written on it.
Oh, the VIPness. Those gikos.
You, don't come to Secret Areas of VIP Quality just because it's 150 VIP coins, VIPPER.
It's only 150 VIP coins, 1-5-0 VIP coins for crying out loud.
There're even entire clowder of felines here. A clowder of 4, all out for some Secret areas of vip quality, huh? How fucking nice.
"Alright, Shii's gonna download the VIPtronics." God I can't bear the VIP.
You people, I'll give you 150 VIP coins if you get out of those seats.
Secret areas of vip quality should be a quality place.
That happy atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the moon loli to issho can start a SJIS thread at any time,
the VIP or Die mentality, that's what's great about this place.
Clonepa and Beady eyes should screw off and stay home.
Anyways, I was about to start posting, and then the bastard beside me goes "extra Elitism, with AA."
Who in the world orders extra Elitism nowadays, you VIPsaurus?
I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want to post with extra Elitism?"
I want to release the emergency mittens on him. I want to release the emergency mittens him for roughly all of september.
Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "extra Elitism"?
Coming from a SAOVQ veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, extra DQN.
That's right, extra DQN. This is the vet's way of VIPPING.
Extra DQN means more DQN than Elitism. But on the other hand the Quality is a tad higher. This is the key.
And then, it's VIPhats. This is Quality.
However, if you post this then there is danger that you'll be marked by the Daddyc ool from next time on; it's a double-edged sword.
I can't recommend it if you haven’t paid him enough.
What this all really means, though, is that you, VIPPER, should just stick with world4chan.